How to Build and Maintain Good Family Relationships

written by: Eva Stateson; article published: year 2006, month 10;

In: Root » Home and family » Personal life

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The law says that it is the quality of time at work that counts and the quantity of time at home that matters.
By improving the quality of your work time, concentrating single-mindedly on your highest-value tasks and getting them done quickly and well, you can reduce the time you spend at work and increase the time available for your personal life.

At home, you need long, unbroken periods of time to build and maintain high-quality relationships. Love, affection, and trust building cannot be rushed. The more time you invest in relationships with the important people in your life, the higher quality of life you will have in all areas.

Remember that watching television, reading the newspaper, or working on your computer does not constitute spending time with your loved ones. Interacting, not just spending time in the same place, is what builds relationships.

Deliberately create chunks of time with your loved ones. Create thirty-, sixty-, and ninety-minute blocks of time where you can interact one-on-one and face-to-face.
Go shopping and go for walks with your family. Take long drives to a distant restaurant or to a resort with your spouse. And when you drive, leave the radio off. A car with no music playing is one of the greatest mobile communication chambers imaginable. You will be amazed at the wonderful conversations you can have in a quiet car.

Plan vacations in advance. Schedule them completely. Pay for them in full. Make the payments nonrefundable if possible. Then discipline yourself to take the time away, no matter what happens.
The times you spend away and on vacation with your loved ones will include the happiest and most important memories of your lives together. Your job is to create as many opportunities for these happy experiences to take place, and for these memories to develop, as you possibly can.

Remember that to do more of one thing, you must do less of another. To spend more time with your loved ones, you must do less of something else.

Before you commit to or engage in any behavior, ask yourself, "What will I have to not do in order to do this?" Compare the value of one activity with the other. Your ability to make good choices about how you spend your time largely determines the quality of your life.

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